Everson’s Watery Eye Spicy Stir Fry!

I HAVE BEEN MAKING stir fry dishes since I was in college. Back then, it was partly for affordability. You could throw together a bunch of cheap ingredients and eat for days. But… if it’s done right, a good spicy stir fry is a fairly healthy flavor explosion. Out of all the things I cook, it’s one of the things I love the most, and honestly, I’ve never had anything like the way I make it in a restaurant. And if you’ve scored some good hot peppers, the taste will make you cry from both joy and heat.

The recipe shifts a little, depending on what’s in the fridge, but there are a few constants — there are always a lot of peppers, onions, fresh ginger, and bacon and eggs. One of the keys, to me,  is to have a large electric fryer, so that you can cook all of the veggies evenly and quickly without making them too soggy. I’ve got an electric wok… but I’ve always preferred the long rectangular fryer. I have also found that, while it makes more dishes, it’s useful to chop everything and have it ready in separate bowls prior to getting too far into the cooking process… chopping always takes longer than you expect!

Here’s how I do it:

Watery Eye Spicy Stir Fry
Prep Time: About an hour




  • 1 Sweet Red Pepper (you can add green Bell Pepper too, but you need the sweet red)
  • 2-3 large Jalapenos (the more visible veins, the better)
  • 2 Serrano Peppers
  • 1 Gypsy or Hot Banana Pepper
  • 1-2 extra-large Sweet Onions
  • 1 small Zucchini
  • 2 arms of Broccoli
  • 1 branch of fresh Ginger
  • 1 stalk of Lemongrass, cut into one-inch segments
  • 2-3 Green Onions
  • 4-6 fresh White Mushrooms (fresh)
  • 1 bunch of fresh Cilantro
  • 5 strips of bacon
  • 2 large eggs
  • 2 cups uncooked white Jasmine Rice
  • 3-4 tablespoons Vegetable Oil
  • 3-4 tablespoons of Soy Sauce
  • 3-4 tablespoons Spicy Stir Fry Sauce
  • Dash of salt

VARIANTS: You can add yellow and orange Bell Peppers to augment the “sweet” and to kick up a spicy stir fry you can add Thai Hot Peppers, Fingerhots or Habaneros to increase the “heat.” But you should always have Red Bell Pepper and Jalapenos as the base. Adding fresh pea pods and bok choi is never a bad thing.  If you’re not a fan, you can skip the broccoli or the mushrooms and it won’t change the taste much. I usually have a bag of mixed frozen diced carrots, beans, peas and corn in the freezer and I’ll sometimes toss a couple handfuls of that into the mix. You can also dice up and add chicken or pork to augment the “meat” portion, though I honestly like it best simply with bacon.



  1. On the stove, combine two cups of uncooked rice with 4 cups water. Add a dash of salt, a tablespoon of vegetable oil and 2 or 3 one-inch sections of the lemongrass branch (you don’t strictly need the lemongrass, but it does give a nice flavor to your rice). Bring the water to a boil and then simmer covered for 15-20 minutes until the water has been absorbed. When the rice is done, turn off the heat and leave covered until you need it.
  2. Dice the onion, and slice the zucchini, broccoli and mushrooms. Honestly, I’m not a big fan of broccoli, so I don’t use much… but I put it in in a vague nod to nutrition. Eat your broccoli.
  3. Put the chopped veggies in a bowl or bowls (depending on how anal you are! I keep each ingredient in its own container until I’m ready for it.)
  4. Scrape the skin off of the ginger branch, and then slice the flesh. I usually slice the ginger into 1/2 inch narrow strips. Set to the side.
  5. Slice the peppers to your preference (I chop the jalapenos and serranos so that they are in “circle” sections, and the larger peppers I cut in strips, and usually then cut the strips in half ). Do not strip and discard the seeds, but leave them in the pepper slices… they will provide the heat!
  6. Rinse and chop the green onions and the cilantro.
  7. In a large electric frying pan (I usually have the temperature set between 300-350), begin frying the bacon strips. As the bacon cooks, combine the eggs in a glass and whisk with a fork until the yolk and white are well mixed. You can add a splash of milk to it too if you want (fluffier eggs). When the bacon is beginning to get crispy on the edges, push it to one side and pour in the egg. Scramble the egg, and then remove both the bacon and egg to a plate.
  8. Add the remainder of the vegetable oil to the bacon grease, and pour in the onion. Saute for a couple minutes until the edges begin to yellow, then add the rest of the vegetables. Stir for 10 minutes or so, at least partially covered (helps cook the veggies faster and keeps the oil from spitting).
  9. Chop up the bacon and then add the bacon and eggs back to the pan, adding the  soy sauce and stir fry sauce.
  10. Once all the vegetables are tender (but not too soggy!) add in the rice and… stir it in until most of the white has been coated with the sauces. You can serve almost immediately, or leave it sit on low heat for awhile until your hungry mob is ready.

And that’s it.

Prepare to have your tastebuds dance. And if you were generous with your peppers, maybe shed a tear.

If you liked this recipe, try my other culinary concoctions!

About John Everson

John Everson is a Bram Stoker Award-winning horror author with more than 100 published short stories and 14 novels of horror and dark fantasy currently in print. His first novel, Covenant, won the Bram Stoker Award for a First Novel in 2005. His sixth novel, NightWhere, was a Bram Stoker Finalist in 2013. Its sequel, The Night Mother, was released in June 2023.

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